Croup Cough, Crocodile Tears, Runny Noses and CRY FOR HELP!

Just the other day, while I ventured out to a park at the beach, a gentleman pushing his sweet, little 2 year old daughter on the swing asked me a question..."How do you do it?  How do you manage life with four small children?"  I wanted to burst out laughing because what he saw was only a glimpse of  "kid and life management".  I will give you the answer to his question after I explain the series of events on that very day!

It started out with our 5 year old boy having the horrific croup -cough going on day 4.  (That means 4 days of a mom who was surviving on VERY little sleep)  I had been awake sitting on a toilet lid holding my son in a steaming hot bathroom, so that he could inhale the steam and open up his airway to breathe.  These four nights of croup followed up, after a two-week and still on-going battle of an eight month old's runny nose, cough and cold that won't seem to ever leave!  I proceeded to take my son to urgent care with his sister and check to see if their lungs were clear.  We waited in a tiny office for 2 hours, during nap time!  Four kids and Dr. gadgets everywhere!  I used up all my energy saying ,"No!!! don't touch those latex gloves, sit still, put down the blood pressure cuff, leave the sink alone, quit playing with the Dr.'s computer and stop stepping on your sister's toes..." (you get the picture!)

 After the long visit at the Dr.'s office, we traveled to our "surf shack". (Our trailer house at the beach, close to daddy's work).  Avalon decided it would be a good time to scream the entire way!  Her lungs were cleared out about 45 minutes into the drive.  I had Austin trying to feed her chunky fruit baby food to keep her happy.  That didn't go as planned!  She used her mighty fist to fling baby food across the backseat,windows and laps of siblings.  (Guess who had to pull over on the freeway to clean that up)?! 

After reaching our final destination, I thought it would be a good idea to take everyone for a nice walk on the beach to get some fresh air.  Bad idea!  The cold wind was blowing and the sun starting headed downward.  In one hand I held the leash of our pit bull/lab mix and in the other hand was a baby!  The other kiddos ran ahead down their favorite tunnel that leads to the pier.  I was desperately trying to hold back the strong- pulling, eager dog and keep from falling and sliding on my behind with a baby in tow.  That was a great snapshot!  One guy said in passing,"Who's taking who for a walk"?  In my mind I replied, "I know.  I am a terrible dog trainer, but can a mom have a little sympathy here"?! 

We got to the cold beach park at sunset.  Just enough time to take a couple pushes on the swing, go down a slide or two, hang from monkey bars and then head back up to the car.  The very loving Austin thought it would be fun to twist the chains of his older sister's swing so that when he let go, she would go un-twisting and throw up!  We had lots of spectators!  All the while, Auburn is sitting on her swing crying because she wants to be pushed and mom is busy handling a dog and a baby. We probably should have stayed home again!

 And then a calm moment.  No crying.  No screaming.  No sadness!  All the children are playing nicely.  I tied the dog up.  The baby was cozy happy in her sling with mama and I pushed Auburn in the swing just the way she liked it. 

And then the gentleman comes over... plops his little 2 year old girl into the toddler swing and says to me in amazement," How do you do that?  How do you manage life with four kids"?  Now you know why I wanted to burst out laughing!  He only saw a glimpse of motherhood.  He saw a fragment of what life with four small children is like.  His view was not the complete picture.  He saw smiles and sunshine.  He didn't see the crocodile tears, lack of sleep, runny noses, barking dog, throwing up, hanging on by a thread moments of the day.  I replied with a chuckle, "ONLY WITH GOD'S HELP CAN I DO ANYTHING AT ALL"!!! 

And I really honestly mean that!  Life as a mom is one of the hardest things I have ever done.  It requires all of me.  Every part of me.  I can't call in sick and ask for a sub!  (Although my mom helps me out a ton)!  I am realizing that "plan A" never works out.  I can't truly be prepared.  I can always expect something to go wrong.  But that's the way life is.  If it always worked out perfectly... I would never see my need for God. So I am thankful for the humbling memories of life with kids.  I am reminded daily to ask God for help!

Now, please excuse me, I have a baby crying in her crib.  gotta go.

Should a mother of four kids go out in public?

  My friends who are out in public with me have commented on how much we are stopped by other people.  Where ever we go, people have something to say about "my situation".  Some people are friendly, some are curious, some state the truth, some laugh, some have pity, some want to chat, some want to hold the baby, some want to give me advice, some just smile and others just stare.  The reality of the Cherry family is that we are different.  We are white and we have a baby who has different skin color.  We are considered a "large" family, because we have more than the average 2.5 children.  We are all blond hair and blue eyes.  Our new little addition is brown hair, brown eyes.  So wherever we go, people want to know more. So I thought it would be funny to write down all the comments or questions that I get  from people when I am in public with all 4 of my kids.

• "Wow!!!!...You sure have your hands full"!!!  (As I walk through  the grocery store, with three kids holding onto the cart and a baby riding up front.)  My Reply~"Yep"!  (As I keep walking.)

• "Are ALL those kids yours"???  (While all my kids are trying to talk at the same time and get my attention.)  My reply~"Yep"! (As I keep walking.)

• "Is that YOUR baby"??? (As they stare at Avalon's obvious skin color difference.)  My reply~"Yep"!  (As I keep walking.)

• "Somebody sure needs a nap"!!! (As Avalon is crying in the car seat, while I am ordering a cup of coffee in the drive-thru.)  My reply~"Yep"!  (As I keep ordering.)

• "So what made you decide to have another baby"???  My reply~ "God." (As I explain why we chose to adopt.  Usually this one takes up a lot of time, so I can't keep walking.)

• "How come your kids aren't in school"??? (As I do my errands during school hours)  My reply~"I home school." (As  I try to keep walking, a whole set of new questions come, and I stop to explain.)

• "I sure am glad all my kids are grown up"!  My reply~smile and nod.

• "How in the world do you shop with 4 kids"?  My reply~smile and keep walking.

• "I bet you go to bed early every night".  My reply~smile, nod and keep walking.

• "Are you a foster parent"????  My reply~"She's adopted." (smile and keep walking).

• "Wow!!! You sure are a busy mom"!!!  My reply~"Yep". (smile and keep walking)

• "You have a black baby"!!!  (usually this one is from a little kid who isn't afraid to tell the obvious truth.  lol!)  My reply~"Yep". (smile and keep walking)

So I am in the learning process.  I am eight months into how to appropriately reply to comments or questions while out in public.  Most of the time, I smile and keep walking.  But then there are times where I stop to talk.  It is my children who don't understand it.  They just want to shop, go, play.  They ask me everyday, "Mom, why does everyone always ask about Avalon?  Why do they want to stop and talk so much?  How come people have so many questions they ask you?"  My reply~"God knew that baby Avalon was going to be in our family from the beginning.  He created all of our skin colors.  He wanted her to be with us.  We will never understand why God does what he does.  We will never comprehend His ways.  What we do know is that God put each of you kids with your dad and me.  People see that Avalon is different, they want to know who she is.  People want to know why we have four kids.  People want to know why we home school.  People are trying to figure us out.  And most people don't understand how much of a blessing children really are"!  So, everyday as I venture out into the great big world full of people's opinions, I ask God to help me know the right way to handle it.  I think that most people view children as a burden and getting in their way.  I think it is so sad that we live in a time, where children are forgotten and ignored.  God help me to appreciate the lives He placed under my care.  May I never believe the lie that children are not special. 

My reply~ "I have four kids. I homeschool.  I do life with my kids. I go out in public and I am not afraid of critical minds!  I will embrace "my situation" with gladness"!
"Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward..."

"A LOOSE LIZARD IN MY CAR"!

The three older A's raced around the rocks, chasing after a speedy lizard.  That lil' sucker was smart and fast!  The kids came up with a game plan as to how to catch and out-smart the poor thing.  After many failed attempts, they finally won the game!  They quickly dumped him into a Rubbermaid container, filled it with rocks, dirt and grass.  Then carried it to the car for a one-hour drive back home.  The four year old, Auburn was thrilled to place the container on her lap!  She was chuckling and grinning from ear to ear for the first 30 minutes of the drive.  But her curiosity got the best of her.  She carefully and quietly removed the lid.  And out jumped "Racer the Lizard"!  She was so excited to chase after him, while seated in her booster seat!  It was just too boring watching him in a plastic container...she wanted some excitement along with her long drive home!   Well ...she wasn't the only one with a little adventure.  I was absolutely terrified to have "Racer the Lizard" loose in the car, while I  was driving!  I felt my skin crawling with fear!  I was paranoid!  All I could think about was a creepy reptile walking across my leg or neck! 

Well, you guessed it!  My worst fear came true!  I screamed like a drama queen!  My arms went flying through the air, my feet came up tucked into my chest and I totally lost it! ....Austin couldn't control his laughter!  It was a prank!  Austin played off of my fear!  From that point on...he kept walking his squirmy fingers across my shoulders, just to get a good reaction from me!  Isn't that just like a five-year-old BOY!

The ending of the story: "Racer  the Lizard" was found once when arrived home.  The awful thing was thrown out onto the asphalt by a mean, hot-tempered mama...ME! 

So what is the moral of the story?  The CHASE is the most exciting part of life!  It's the adrenaline rush!  It's the thrill of the unexpected!  It's the journey to find satisfaction.! It's the happy feeling!  It's the journey of reaching success!  It's the thought of what could be!  It's the fear of the unknown!  The "fast ride"  is what most people spend their entire lives striving for.  Most people are bored and want something to look forward to.  Most people aren't content with the present life now.  Most people want more fun, more love, more adventure, more toys, more thrills, more adrenaline, more laughs, more romance, more money, more of just about anything.  Just like Auburn, CHASING her lizard was the best part!  Holding "Racer"  on her lap, watching it do absolutely nothing; was just not fun!!!  So what did she do?  She opened up the lid and let him out.  She wanted the CHASE AGAIN!  So here's the deal...Catching what it is we are looking for...leads to absolutely nothing.   It leaves you wanting another CHASE! 

"I have seen all the things that are done under the sun; all of them are meaningless,
a chasing after the wind." Ecc. 1:14

"Satisfy us in the morning with your (God's) unfailing love,
that we may sing for joy and be glad all our days. "Psalm 90:14

Walking into a BEE~HIVE!

So I walked onto the porch of our little home at the beach.  It was a beautiful, warm sunny morning.  And I looked out onto what completely took me by surprise!  About 500 buzzing bees swarming in a bush only 15 steps away from the front door!  They were not there yesterday.  They must have established residence last night, while we were all sleeping in our cozy beds!  The bush in front of me had an amazingly delicate and organized living quarters; known as a bee hive.  It was huge!  There were bees coming and going...making honey and pollinating flowers!  My curiosity got the best of me!  I had to grab the camera!  I called out to the children to come and see what lay before me.  They came running full speed ahead to the front door...then each of them came to a crashing halt, like dominoes falling upon each other!  "MOM, why did you want us run out here, to get stung by bees"???  They asked me completely confused!  They took a quick look and stumbled back into the house full of a healthy dose of fear! 

It was then that I realized a great truth that God put into the heart of man!  James 4:17 "So any person who knows what is right to do but does not do it, to him it is sin."  My kids knew the power that bees had over them.  They knew that if they got too close, they would get stung! They have had the experience of the terrible bee sting in the past!  The pain of a bee sting was not worth their curiosity!  And not only was it one bee...there were hundreds!  They knew how serious this danger truly was.  They did what they knew was best...THEY RAN!  THEY FLED!  They shut the door behind them as fast as their little hands could grab the door handle!  They taught their mama a lesson today!  While I was dabbling in my curiosity, they were safe inside. 

The bees and my children have warned me to run away from anything that could cause me to get stung!  Dabbling in sin is not worth the sting!  Sometimes it can be a little sting...and sometimes it turns out into a really painful 100 stings!  I am thankful that my children understand the reality of danger!  On our way home, we discussed how the bee hive was a physical picture with a spiritual lesson to learn!  God sets boundaries for his children so that they are protected and safe.  He gives us the choice to walk away from bad temptations.  Sometimes we listen to His wisdom and other times we walk right into the bee hive! 

I pray that my children will remember this day.  That every time they face a temptation that could harm them, they would flee!  I pray that they see the bigger picture!  I pray that they see the sting instead of feeling the sting!  I pray that they choose to stay secure in God's boundaries the rest of their lives!  I pray that each of them chooses to run and shut the door behind them!  I pray that early in life, they learn to take sin seriously and not fall victim to it's stinger! I pray they carry a "healthy dose of  fear" with them, as they grow older and leave mommy and daddy.  Genesis 4 :7 warns us..." Sin is waiting to attack you, longing to destroy you.  But you can conquer it"!  The way we conquer sin is to run to a safe place!  Run into the safety and protection of your home in Christ Jesus!!!!

"THAT MAMA"!!!

This is a personal post to all wives out there, who also have the great responsibility of motherhood and sometimes feel completely overwhelmed...

Have you ever been "THAT MAMA'" who can't get her toddler to stop screaming in the cart, while grocery shopping?  Who has children riding the shopping cart like a skateboard? Who forgot to empty the pockets of pants, before washing/drying them? Who doesn't shower for days, because it requires one more thing to add to the list?  Or... who wears shirts that smell like spit up and spoiled milk?  The mama who trips over toys and stuffed animals in the middle of the night, while trying to walk to the crib and rescue the crying baby?  I have.   I am guilty of them all...and way more than that too!!!

There are days where I look over at the peaceful mother, rocking her sleeping infant and get jealous.  There are days where I get on Facebook and see other mama's who post the success of their day...and I want to cry, because my day stinked!  There are days, where I witness a mama who sews clothes and quilts, grows her own vegetables, makes her own baby food, irons her hubby's dress shirts, scrapbooks her children's happy memories and bakes the most delicious chocolate chip cookies.  And I want to curl up in a ball and hide from all the mamas who have it ALL TOGETHER!

Then... when I have had just about enough "comparing" in my thought life for the day...I go to my Creator.  The One who knit me together inside my mother's womb.  The One who sees my heart, feels my struggles, reads my thoughts and He is there to pick me up, dust off my dirty knees and whisper words of encouragement to my soul.  He gently reminds me, "Don't worry about anything: instead pray about everything: tell God your needs and don't forget to thank Him for all His answers.  If you do this, you will experience God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand.  His peace will keep your thoughts and your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Christ Jesus."  Philippians 4:6-7

And I am still...quiet...peaceful.  In the midst of a hectic life with spilled milk, dirty laundry, a dinner waiting to be cooked, books to be read to kids and unfinished projects...I am content.  God made me who I am.  I am not a seamstress or organic baker or scrap-booker or photographer or gardener.  God gave me different gifts and talents. I don't have to try to be like HER.  I am free to be me!  Praise God!

"GRAY AREAS"...

Life is about choices.  Some choices are easy...What to wear?  What to eat?  Some choices  require a lot more thought...How to spend our time wisely?  How to spend or save our money?  And some choices effect us the rest of our lives...Who to marry?  How to discipline our kids?  You get the picture,  right?!  Some choices are "black or white", while some are "gray".  And it is those akward "gray" choices that can get us into really big trouble!

 I am starting to believe that the "gray" choices are really Satan's way of making the black ones look more appealing!  With "white" choices you can never go wrong.  It may not be the easy or fun route.  But it is always the right thing to do!  It is always God's best choice for us!  It always represents TRUTH.  And it is the truth that sets us free! 

With "black" choices, we are just plain stupid!  We don't care what the consequence is at the time.  We don't pay attention to the outcome.  We just fall victim to self gratification!  If it feels good...do it.

And now the "gray".  I spend so much of my time battling the "gray" area.  The "black"  I can avoid without too much heartache.  I know better than that!  I usually tend to run far away from black areas, because I don't want to hurt myself or anyone else that I love dearly.  But those gray areas just creep into every part of my day somehow.  In my mind, white choices=GOOD.  black choices=BAD.
Gray choices=COMPROMISE.  Satan has me fooled to think that compromise isn't bad or good, it stands alone.  It can be whatever you want it to be at the time.  But the reality of this foolish idea is that gray is neither hot or cold...it is lukewarm.   And who want lukewarm coffee?  It should be over ice or steaming hot!  What God is teaching me, is that GRAY=COMPROMISE.  It is simple math.  BLACK+WHITE=GRAY.  And light has no place with darkness.  So I sit here pondering my gray areas.  Those moments when I sleep in too long don't spend time in prayer.  Those moments when I let my kids get away with poor attitudes because I am tired of correcting them.  Those moments when I speak harshly to my husband or children after a long day.  Those moments of eating more than I should.  Those moments when I should turn off the TV.  Those moments when I say no to helping out a neighbor.  Those moments of not listening.  Those tiny "harmless gray" choices make up who we are.  So today I ask God to help me see the color gray for what is truly is...an ugly, dull shade of black.  What about you?