Today...for the first time... they met God.

Today I witnessed a crowd before me.  Many faces.  Some had a skin tone of glowing white.  Some a sick pale white.  Some a beautiful shade of dark cocoa.  Some a soft, warm, cozy brown.  Many had smiles.  More had sorrow.  I usually live in my own world, trying to keep my four little ducklings in tow- following my side, as I walk about the halls at church. 

Today was different.

 As I sat in the cushy church seats, I observed the families that surround me.  My thoughts were outside myself.  They entered into the hearts and minds of people (all ages) next to me.  The room was silent with no talking, except the sound of a guitar and the sweet, simple voices of a husband and wife leading us in songs.  As I listened to the music.  I tried to sing.  I could not.  My soul was heavy.  It was full of noise.  Not the noise of my own worries or concerns.  It was heavy with the heart aches and cries of those all around me.  I could hear their hearts beating with anxiety.  I could feel their deadly pulse of depression.  I could sense their strong- pulling tension.  I could feel the cold-bitterness that lingered in their inner core.  I could see the faces wrinkled with doubt.  I saw the tears of single mothers... alone.  I saw the wife who kept looking at her husband in disapproval.  I saw the elderly woman, holding on the shoulder of the younger to help keep her balance.  I witnessed the mother and father walking in late with exhaustion, from their troubled teens.  I sat.  I listened.  I was deeply saddened and not sure what to do with my emotions. Do I sing like everyone else?  I did not.  I could not.  I was not able to concentrate on the words being sang.  They people demanded my attention.  I was glued to the invisible, but very real reality of life...the inward battles people were trying to choke down.

So I prayed.  I lifted up these hurting souls to God Almighty.  I begged  for God to fill up the empty hearts with Himself.  To pour out peace and comfort to His children.  I pleaded on their behalf...for healing. Not so much a physical healing...but a healing that brings forgiveness and love to the aches and pains that others have brought upon them.  I prayed that the families would be set free from the trap of the enemy!  I prayed that these people would know how God loves them and created them for a purpose.  I prayed.  God listened.

After our pastor concluded his sermon, he gave an open invitation to the church.  He asked if anyone wanted to know "real love" personally?  He asked if anyone wanted forgiveness? He asked if anyone wanted to lose their baggage and carry a lighter load?  He asked if anyone wanted to accept the free, un-earned, gift of grace from God?  He asked...the people responded. 

As the guitar played softly in the background, the people came.  One by one, they walked to the front of the church.  One by one, they stood up out of their seat and the chains were broken.  One by one, the people were set free.  All the tension, all the doubt, all the fear, all the anxiety were left at the alter.  They came and Jesus met them.  With His arms wide open.  He received their broken lives and they were made new!  Tears rolled down my cheeks.  The man (who's wife looked at him with disapproval) went forward.  (She wept.)  The teenager walked forward. (They wept.)  A husband and wife held hands and walked forward as a team. (They wept.) The elderly woman made her way to the front with a small child. (I wept.)  A child with a cute pink hat walked boldy alone to the front.  More than a dozen hurting people found "real love". 

 Today...for the first time... they met God.  I wept  with joy, because I knew their lives would never be the same!  I knew that they would be forever changed.  Not just on this earth...but for eternity!  And then with the guitar, I sang.  My mind was not cluttered by the silent cries of people...it was rejoicing for the people had found their Savior!

1 Kings 8:28 

^"Yet regard the prayer of Your servant and his supplication, O LORD my God, and listen to the cry and the prayer which Your servant is praying before You today:"

Psalm 94:19 

"In the multitude of my anxieties within me,
         Your comforts delight my soul".

Toxins and Throwing Up

As we were driving up the beautiful mountains of Big Bear, I heard a familiar sound that we all know.  It was the good ole barfing sound coming from the back seat!  I quickly grabbed my empty, sparkling, purple coffee mug to catch the remainder of Aspen's dinner. Too bad the cup wasn't large enough to hold dinner!  It fell upon her new jeans, onto our dog who sat at her feet and my hand that held the fancy cup.  As the scent of bile and chicken filled our truck and I felt the aftermath upon my hand and ...I rolled my window down to let my dinner go too!  O the lovely joys of getting car sick!

Or what about the time Erik and I ate those juicy, plump, polish hot-dogs from the race track vendor the night before our wedding anniversary?!  The entire next day... we celebrated our wonderful years of marriage throwing up over a toilet bowl from food poisoning!

And then there was the event where my nephew was poisoned from drinking bad, stagnant water in Peru and ended up with high fevers, weight loss and not keeping any food down for days.

I surely remember the adventure of being in terrible labor for 30+ hours with my first child and encountered the worst case of nausea I have ever experienced in my life!  I never knew vomiting could feel so bad!

So now that you have a nicely painted picture in your head about vomit...let me continue.  Even though barfing is not fun, nor does it leave the most pleasant after-taste in one's mouth...the best part of throwing up is when it's over!  After Aspen threw up in the truck during our long drive to the mountains, she simply stated to us, "I feel sooooo much better now.  I am not sick anymore"!  News Flash to Rachel!  God is teaching me yet another life lesson!  And... it's from my hand being covered in my daughter's vomit!  Here are my cliff notes I became aware of  recently:

Vomit is the body's way of letting something go...that needs to go!  It's trying to get rid of toxins.  It's trying to create space in the upset tummy.  It's wanting to get clean again.  It's the body saying, "Give me a  break, would ya"!   Once the body has rid itself of the poison, germs, toxins...it begins to heal.  And once healing takes place, the body can return to normal once again.

Sometimes I fill my life with toxins!  I don't mean drugs or cigarettes.  The toxins I am referring too, are not tangible objects or substances.  The toxins I ingest are not seen.  They begin in my mind.  The ugly toxins that bring harm to my life and seek to destroy me are the thoughts that I allow to dwell upon.  They can be doubt, fear, anxiety, people-pleasing, impatience, and lack of faith.  I bring these thoughts into my mind, digest them and become spiritually sick by them.  Sometimes, I choose to let them control me, take over me, win the battle and poison me.  Instead of listening to the warning signs of feeling sick, I keep stuffing myself with more toxins.  I fall deeper into the danger zone.  I focus my thoughts on me. me. me. instead of  God.  God.  God. 

Toxins can come in many forms.  Some are easy to see.  Others are hidden.  Some are the obvious ones like drugs or alcoholism.  Toxins can be bitterness towards someone who has hurt us.  Toxins can be living life to please others, instead of being who God made us to be.  Toxins can be constantly putting ourselves in unhealthy relationships.  Toxins can be reading romance novels and secretly wanting the life of the princess; swept away by the prince, and being envious.  Toxins can be sitting in front of the computer and becoming numb to those in need around us.  Toxins can be racking up debt to buy the new cars, houses, clothes or furniture.  Toxins are the things that consume our heart, mind and soul.  Toxins can lead to a slow, painful spiritual death.  They put us first and others last.  So when we feel the fever coming...or the gag reflex....or the feeling in the pit of our stomach...let it go!  Don't stuff more toxins in.  Throw up!  Confess them!  Lose them!  Get rid of the yucky toxins that are eating away at our soul, robbing us of living life to the fullest! 

Psalm 30:2 

 "LORD my God, I called to you for help, and you healed me".  

I praise God for the times when I can mentally and emotionally throw up!  I confess my doubt, fear, anxiety, people-pleasing tendencies, impatience with others and lack of faith in God! I let God take over and be my Great Physician! 

Psalm 103: 2-4

 "Bless the LORD, O my soul,
         And forget not all His benefits:
 Who forgives all your iniquities,
         Who heals all your diseases,
 Who redeems your life from destruction,
         Who crowns you with loving kindness and tender mercies..."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cJNL00oVGHI

O, the pleasures of....Cookie Dough!

Cookie dough or cake batter! 

It is just one of those things I am drawn towards!  My mom used to eat chocolate-cake-batter mix from a box while she was pregnant with me.  Just add 2 eggs, a half of cup of oil to chocolate cake mix in a bowl....grab a large wooden spoon and some milk to go with it!  What a perfect ending to a pregnant day!  

I also carried on the cake batter or cookie dough tradition while I was pregnant!  While Erik was deep under the heart of the ocean in a submarine during his Navy years...I was baking in the kitchen.  The only problem was that I never got to the baking part!  I mixed all the ingredients together and kept the oven pre-heating while I enjoyed the batter!   The oven just got hotter, and I just kept sampling... until there was none left to bake!  I used to sit with a large glass of cold milk and eat the perfect combination of chocolate chips with creamy butter, sugar and flour!  I had it down to a science!  I didn't need to follow any cookie recipes!  I had a mental note embedded in my brain!  In fact I carried the pregnant/cookie dough tradition on with each child that I carried! 

In our  homeschooling years, my older sister set out to find the "perfect chocolate chip cookie recipe"!  I have to say the most fun about finding the perfect cookie was sampling ALL the dough!  If the dough wasn't fabulous...I tossed out the recipe!  I think us three sisters  decided that the family who carried the best cookie was a family in our church who had four little darlings.  We  babysat their kids lots of weekends!  We LOVED baby sitting these toe-heads, because they were adorable, not to mention there mama always had a cookie jar filled with her amazing chocolate chip cookies!  She must have known they were the highlight of our day!  She was so good about making sure we had plenty to eat!  God bless her for pouring out such love to us girls! 

When I think of cookie dough, I can't help but be flooded with happy memories!  It represents a sweet treat after a hard day at public high-school, it represents fellowship with my sisters, it represents the days I carried my little babies in my tummy. It's a comfort food that will always be close to my heart! I think perhaps everybody has a "food item" that triggers a flood of emotions and happiness.  Maybe it's a diet coke or candy car, or cup of soup.  I know that cookie-dough isn't a healthy-good-for-me snack that  an aerobics instructor should be eating!  But it sure is good for my soul!  It is a friend that never let's me down!

So as I think about cookie dough, I ponder something else....Why is it that I love cookie dough more than the cookies a day later?  It just is.  There is no great explanation.  It simply is!  Icecream companies have learned of this truth!  Now there is cookie dough icrecream!  Sometimes things are better raw!

I hope to be like cookie dough someday!   I hope to be a "cookie dough mother", who brings comfort to her babies after a hard day.  A "cookie dough" wife ,who comes alongside to be my hubby's companion and friend! A "cookie dough sister" who makes special memories that bring joy and friendship!  A "cookie dough daughter" who brings a smile to my parents face.  A "cookie dough friend" that is there to give hugs and encouragement when needed. I know it sounds silly.  If only I could pour out love on others like cookie dough!

What Does Extreme Sports and LOVE have in common?

I married an extreme sports guy.  No...not a football fan, or soccer or baseball or even basketball kind of guy.  Team sports aren't his thing.  He is into anything that goes super fast and requires being fearless!  It's more like racing cars, off-roading, dirt-biking, down-hill mountain biking, motorcycle riding on the race tracks, learning to fly airplanes, snowboarding and skiing.  While I was dating him, I thought this extreme sports stuff was super hot!  11 years and 4 kids later, I think he is absolutely crazy!  I fear for his life! And now our son is turning out to be just like his daddy!  I will never hold the "soccer mom" title. Nope...I will be the mom of a extreme-adrenaline-rush kind of boy, who is always in the ER for broken bones!  I am sure that the hospital staff will know us by name!  So, let me explain where I am going with this...

Have you ever read the marriage book, "His Needs, Her Needs"?  Well,  I have.  Erik and I studied the book many years ago.  One of the chapters I will never forget is about the importance of  "recreational companionship".  That long title basically means...joining in on the fun with your spouse!   Do what he loves!  If he likes talking politics, do it!  If he likes playing golf, go to the driving range with him.  If he wants to play cards...go grab a deck of cards.  I am in BIG TROUBLE!  My husband doesn't like the easy stuff....He prefers getting greasy under cars and racing down the slopes of mountains!  OH NO!!!! What am I to do?!!!  Can't we just sip coffee and go jogging together?  That is more my style!

For 10 years, we did "Rachel's version of recreational companionship".  My loving hubby sat with me at restaurants, went with me to coffee shops and ran around for thrift store adventures.  He did this to fill up my love tank. I was on "FULL"a lot!  He is so sweet to love me the way I need to be loved.  But something was missing.  I was not loving him with the "Erik version of recreational companionship".  Why?  Because of my fear!  I have always been afraid to try the "unknown".  Going fast and falling doesn't sound like much fun to me.  I always told him to do that stuff with the guys, not me.

Over the last decade of our life together as the Cherry couple, we have witnessed hand fulls of friends go through divorces.  People I love and trust have split up.  My heart has been crushed time and time again seeing others lose their "happily-ever-afters".  We have seen  broken marriages from  affairs, boredom, pornography, selfishness....the list goes on.  After talking with a dear friend of mine, who lost her husband. I have been challenged beyond words.  I have realized my own selfishness in not loving my husband the way that he needs me to love him.  Making him lunches, doing his laundry and sending sweet text messages can only go so far.  I have got to love him enough to overcome my selfishness!  I have got to love him, like it's my last days on this earth! 
So what does that look like for me...????
It means this.
~ATTEMPTING TO SNOWBOARD, AND FALLING 100 TIMES, AS I SLIDE DOWN FROZEN WATER WITH MY HAIR FLYING IN MY MOUTH, AND THE LOOK OF DEATH  WRITTEN ACROSS MY FACE WHILE I SPEED DOWN  BUNNY SLOPES ON MY BACKSIDE!  But it also means, seeing a huge smile on his face because he is so proud of me for doing my best. And letting him cheer me on, pick me up, be my hero to the rescue and wipe the snow off my face and say, "Good job babe, way to go, you are doing great"!
It also means...
~RIDING A HANGING CHAIR-LIFT TO THE TOP OF A STEEP MOUNTAIN AND PEDALING OVER ROCKS AND BUSHES ON A MOUNTAIN BIKE, JUMPING OVER HILLS, EATING DUST, SCREAMING IN TERROR AND DELIGHT!  But it also means, looking over at my husband to see the light in his eyes as he watches me try.  I loved the look on his face after our first mountain biking trip.  He had the same look, as when he first laid eyes on me.  He didn't have to say, "I love you, babe".  His face said it all.  He was falling in love with me more that day!

So I am learning that love looks different to all people.  Love, for some folks it's a simple cup of coffee, or washing dishes, or watching the game on TV.  For me it's not that easy.  One of the most important relationships I can ever have is with my husband.  If I continue to go through life doing what I want,  I am the one who ultimately suffers.  Living too comfortably gets me into trouble.  Loving my husband the way I want to...is just plain selfish and foolish.  I must speak his love language.  I must crawl out of my own skin and into his.  I must enter his world.  I must support him in his dreams.  I must live life with him! I must overcome my fear of extreme sports. I will learn to talk car talk.  I will not be afraid to fly in his airplane, (if he gets his pilot's license).  I will jump into snowboard boots and hit the slopes.  Someone asked me the other day, "If he loves you, why does he want you to do something you are afraid of"?  My reply, "I won't let my fear stop me anymore.  Love is way more important than fear.  He has bent over backwards for me.  Now it's my turn"!

Marriage is fragile.  Handle it with care.  Stepping outside my world and into his...has brought us more laughter, more hugs, more memories, more smiles and more conversation than staying in my own world.  It has brought me joy!