"Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, think I'll eat some worms..."

Have you ever heard the song that goes like this," Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, think I'll eat some worms..."  Well,  I am not sure if that is a "real song" or a "made-up" song by my siblings and myself.  But I do remember singing that song many times in my childhood!  Whenever I was pouting, sitting in the feeble position and crying about having no friends...my sisters would sing that song to me.  And I would sing that song to my sisters, if they acted the same.  (Aren't siblings so nice to each other!)

I remember starting to feel myself slip into that very harsh and almost un-escapable emotion of loneliness when I was 19 years old.  I was a newly-wed, married to a wonderful, tender-loving man.  He bent over backwards for me.  He would sacrifice anything, just to make me happy. But while he was a student at a nuclear power plant, working insane hours each week...I was home alone, desperate for a girl-friend who I could hangout with, talk to, shop with, go to coffee with.  I just wanted someone to be my buddy, while my husband was working.  I lived in a new state, experiencing culture shock.  My closest family members lived 2,000 miles away.  I loved being married and embarking on a new adventure...but I was hungry for a friend also.  Each day that passed without a friend (other than my husband of course) grew dimmer.  I was slowly falling into that emotional pit of worms.

It sure is amazing how the feeling of loneliness can effect us in this world of millions of people.  Dwelling of the feeling of loneliness basically robs us of anything good.  We become so inward focused.  We lose our sight.  We suffer silently, waiting for someone to notice us.  Waiting for someone to rescue us from the depths of despair.  We become depressed and start believing the lies of our mind.  We start to believe that we are stupid, worthless individuals; who have no purpose and reason for living.  The hole we choose to live in grows deeper, darker and colder.  We become consumed in our false-reality that we allow ourselves to be in.  We replay the song over and over again..."nobody likes me, everybody hates me, think I'll eat some worms..."  The worms represent feeding our brain the brutally sad, un-healthy, extremely negative, damaging emotions of SELF-PITY!!!  We become so needy for someone to love and accept us and reach out to us, that all we can think about is belonging somewhere and to someone.  We become addicted to the emotion of  feeling un-love able, un-appreciated, un-welcomed and un-attractive.  The sad truth is that while we do that...  we actually become un-reachable!

After many months of loneliness in New York, at the young age of 19, something clicked for me.  It was a freezing cold, gloomy, excessively snowy day.  I sat alone in my ice-covered, silver, CA license plate Saturn, waiting for my cute husband in the parking lot of his work.  It was no different than any other day.  I was used to picking him up from work everyday in the evening.  In fact, all of us one-vehicle families and/or young Navy wives sat and waited in the car  for their husbands at the end of a work day.  It was routine for me.  But this day...I had enough sulking in my loneliness.  I was so sick of having no friends!!!  I was desperate for female conversation!  So I did the un-thinkable!  I stepped out of my warm, cozy car and knocked on a thin layer of ice that lay upon a car window parked next to me.  She rolled down the window timidly.  She had long brown hair, dark brown eyes, a fair complexion, an unsure smile and an adorable baby girl in the backseat.  I boldy asked a question that I had never asked anyone before, "Will you be my friend"?  Then quickly after opening my big, fat mouth, I felt like running back to my car and driving away!  I thought to myself, "How stupid can I be"? 

Within seconds... she burst out laughing and replied, "YES!!! Will you be my friend too"? 

That was the start of a beautiful friendship and the end of our eating worms!  That girlfriend was in the same boat I was in.  She was lonely.  She was in a desperate place of needing friends, encouragement and support. If I would have never bravely knocked on her window...we both would have missed out on so many wonderful memories together!  She was just who I needed to help pull me out of despair.  There was nothing magical about her.  She was just a girl who needed a friend.  And I was just a girl who took a leap of faith and asked the silly, ackward question," Will you be my friend"?

I tell this story because I know there is someone out there right now... lonely.  Desperate to talk.  Hungry for the love of a true friend.  If you are that person, please put the spoon down, stop shoveling worms in your mouth!  Step out in faith and be the friend to someone that you desire.  Good friends are hard to find, but they are almost impossible to find... if you insist that they make the first move!

"Dear friends, we must love each other because love comes from God.

 Everyone who loves has been born from God and knows God."

1 John 4:7